#It's 12 am and I'm tired
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@soullesspaci. Loser how dare you see my post/j
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it's quicker & easier to eat your young
#the hunger games#thg#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#finnick odair#annie cresta#johanna mason#gale hawthorne#FINALLY got a grip on drawing katniss. girl you would not believe the amount of failed sketches that went into this#but i'm happy with them now. peeta & gale r looking a little rough because they're the last ones i drew#and i got tired of cleaning up the lines by the end#wherefore art thou#thg reread#i wish i could go back in time and show these to my 12 year old self i bet little kid me would go crazy#like dude. i drew that. and they all look EXACTLY how i picture them i love drawing portraits i am so good at it
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Bonus 👉👈:
#Its 12 am i should be sleeping 😭#I'm too tired to even comment something interesting#so... hope you like it?#the plot sucks i know that. _.#traditional art#uwu#bendy the dancing demon#cuphead
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I need to draw more
I need to draw my favorite OCs in silly situations
I need to draw angst of my favorite OCs
I need to draw doomed romance of my favorite OCs
I need to draw my favorite OCs getting married
I need to draw my favorite OCs comforting each other when one of them is sick
I need to draw my favorite OCs
I need to draw
I need to draw
I need to draw
I need to draw
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I am having a rough afternoon and could use some joy, so if you have any favorite songs to dance around the kitchen to I'd love to hear them! It does not matter what language they are in, any language is fine
#the person behind the yarn#the us healthcare system sucks#and some days it hits harder than others that I have been sick for nearly 12 years and it seems I am no closer to a diagnosis#I am closer. I have to keep telling myself that. Things have been ruled out and those are steps in the right direction#I'm just tired of it#anyway. Music! please send me your recommendations
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1700's fashion?? OOHOHOH I might have to do another 1700's clan inspired by yours >:3
If you do please tell me so our cats can interact!
There's not a lot of resource on 1700-1710 in colonial American fashion since Americans were a bunch of bumpkins and not wearing fine garments of the upper class (I.e. the stuff that survives and stays in museums). So I'm kind of borrowing from late 1600s / some 1780s even. Expect settler fashion to always be like 50 years behind what's couture.
All that text jumble to say I'm rawdogging this.
#jcooc#jcasks#it's 3 am at an airport and I been up since 12 gimme a break#I'm too tired to make sense#thank you tho I love historical kitties#join us
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Also I quit my job of what would in about a month or two have been 10 years, and perhaps now I will get to actually be a human being again.
#honestly? honestly?#last week i told the two (2) godawful egomaniac lab head Man In Academia bosses i quit and that we need to formalise it asap and i just#felt like a little feather about to float away on a breeze#maybe now i can do normal people things like eat and sleep and have a routine of some sort idk#i have been slowly losing it for at least 3-4 years now#i took a screenshot and last year i had no fewer than 14 fucking travel orders fulfilled#most of which consisted of like 12+ hour days on ships and docks#i'm just so tired man#not for reblogging obviously#i don't really wanna vent anymore or ponder them and the entire godforsaken institution but like#good riddance tbh#which is really really sad when you think about it! but here we are#it was just... no trace of future anywhere to be seen! entirely a Void!!#gonna post a beefy lesbian paladin real quick to push this post down lmao#but i felt like sharing because i know there's good and concerned people who follow me here and i both appreciate and miss you all#and lord knows some of you have been listening to me vent and whine for ages#am i going to miss some great people and the research community of my field? of course but also it was all just completely unsustainable
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why is so much of sewing just tracing and cutting and tracing again q_q i see why people get projectors and use adobe illustrator now
#drawing up a design that i can easily pattern from my sloper: 😊#actually having to make the pattern by tracing and cutting ad infinitum: 😰#piecing together printer paper to get a big enough sheet of paper and doing this ten million times: 🥲😭#not to mention the IRONING.... prewashing the fabric and having to iron 8 yards of fabric???? excuse me????#and then distorting it as i iron bc it has a slight stretch and i got so tired i stopped being careful 2 yards in#and the way that you're supposed to press every seam... excuse me... am i just supposed to have my iron heated and on standby at all times#AND THE STEAM??? i just got stay tape the other day and thought it'd be a neat alternative to stay stitching#BUT IT NEEDS STEAM TO ACTIVATE (which okay makes sense) BUT long story short i'm too afraid to use the steam function#on my iron because none of us are sure if water should go back into a tank that's been in disuse for 30+ years#so instead i get this water spray pen and delicately spray down the length of each piece of stay tape#before i cover it with a piece of gauze and iron it. and then i have to iron it extra so all the water actually evaporates#oh and the spray pen holds as much water as half a pen so i have to walk to the kitchen every 10 sprays to refill it#and i have to do this for every curved edge on my pattern pieces#i mean the alternative is just stay stitching but then i would have to calibrate my settings for a single layer of fabric instead of double#which means i have to switch my needle out more and i'm still new enough that sometimes i install a needles wrong despite going through#all the same exact motions that i usually would. i'm LITERALLY suffering out here. anyway can't wait to sew or whatever#oh and did i mention i went to a sewing meetup recently? yeah...#everyone there bought like $30-$100/yard fabric and i was there awkwardly knowing i only buy like $12/yard fabric#honestly though i have the opposite problem people usually joke about. i find it So hard to find fabric i actually like#it needs to be the right fiber + right color + right pattern/texture + right weight + i have to know exactly what i'm going to make with it
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I am officially taking another break!
Of course, this doesn't mean I'm going to dissappear for several months. It just means there won't be any polls for a little while! Who knew, running a gimmick blog while working and dealing with personal problems would be so taxing?
I'm thinking that this break will either last the month, or the rest of the year. it depends on how I'm feeling.
I'm really excited to relax and just work on OC stuff for a while!
I hope everyone has a great day :DDDD
#not a poll#announcement#I've been meaning to take this break for a while#for the first half of october and the end of september I wasn't even scheduling polls in advance#i would do them like the hour before#which isn't sustainable for me#of course i then scheduled everything from the 12 to today in one sitting#whiiiich is when I'm writing this right now lol#it's midnight for me at the time of writing this and I am so tired lol. but i needed it out of the way#uuuh i lost my train of thought#im going to bed#not when YOU see this. I'm probably bouncing out of my seat excited for halloween when you see this.#animated gif
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I definitely do not have the time for a full essay's worth of commentary on the Casting of Frank Stone, but I definitely could give you that if I did. There is...a lot to take apart there. I am certainly...fascinated...by some of the writing & gameplay choices they made, to summarise my thoughts somewhat vaguely.
A few spoilery comments under the cut.
Like I said, I don't really have the time to offer extensive analysis (a full paper) of the game, but I do want to say a few things.
First and foremost: Do not purchase this game. In the words of Mr. Otzdarva himself: Go and watch someone play it instead. Your play through will be 95% the same as theirs. It is not worth your 50 dollars. If you still want it after you've viewed someone else's playthrough, that is your own right.
I honestly became annoyed with the writing much faster than Mr. Otzdarva did, and at first I thought it was because I was spoiled by BG3's infinitely better writing. But no, it's rather that he was being very patient. He finished with a rather negative opinion of the game, after thoroughly going through it to test just how much control you as the player really have.
I will be fair-- It is certainly a visually stunning game, as far as Supermassive titles go. Much better looking than The Devil in Me. The music is also incredible. And some of the voice acting was well done and added much needed life to otherwise bland characters.
But good grief is the writing utterly nonsensical!! Even if you respect the "a multiverse exists, so anything is possible" fact which is canon to Dead by Daylight itself, it still doesn't make any damned sense. I mean, is it ever explained why there is time travel involved? Or how it is even possible? Did they simply expect people to just assume that Augustine figured out time travel in a certain timeline? Does it have something to do with the Entity, since it can clearly traverse time? If so, why was Sam able to voluntarily time travel to Madi & elder Linda's timeline? Why and how the FUCK is Frank Stone first bound to the mill and then camera using what is clearly the same magic as the horologium, when we know the Entity has not yet been brought to that timeline??
And playing the "anything is possible" card would be fine to explain certain things, I will concede, but it really starts to feel meaningless when you realise just how many massive plot elements are never explained and that none of your choices really have any impact on the ending of the game. The story literally ends the same no matter what you do. And to be fair, I do not think it is a bad ending at all. Barring the corny "trial starting" sound that they jammed in at the last second, I thought the ending was one of the better parts of the game. It works great to make you feel hopeless, and like there is truly no escape from the Entity. I just feel that this format of a "your choices impact the outcome of the story" game was the incorrect format for the story they wanted to tell. Because it truly doesn't even matter if you get everyone killed, or you save everyone-- everything happens the same way and the world's fate is the same.
There are other things that bothered me, too. I thought having Frank Stone appear as this corny, glitchy spectral monster for most of the game was...a terrible choice, both design wise and writing wise. Now, I do not think killing him in the opening was necessarily a bad decision. I honestly thought it was a bold choice that functioned well to surprise the viewer and urge them to continue, so they might discover how the story plays out after the death of the titular character. But keeping him as this ghoulish creature, that honestly looked as though it were from some solo indie developer's first low budget horror game, was awful. He did not feel threatening whatsoever, just wildly out of place in a visual quality sense. I hate the final design much less, it is certainly much more threatening and much, much more gruesome, but it still does not make sense as to why he looks that way. The Entity still had not taken him, why did he appear as this inhuman monster before his entry into the Fog? They should have kept a more humanlike design until the very end of the game, when the Entity arrives. Then, a transformation sequence where the Entity mutates him should have been restricted to the ending where no one from the cast is seen in the Fog, so players at least get something different in that allegedly "unique" ending. After all, if a cast member does get taken, at least you get to see visions of what followed the 1980s storyline.
Also why did Augustine work alone when she is clearly part of the Black Vale? The excuse of "the cult didn't exist yet" doesn't work here, because she can time travel and is fully aware of the multiverse she exists in. Like... I thought elder Linda's mention of secret passages being for staff "so they are seen as little as possible" was foreshadowing for Augustine having fellow cultists aiding her, but it just went nowhere. Another thing that goes nowhere is the baby that Sam can save at the very beginning. Should the baby live or die has absolutely no impact whatsoever on the story, which feels like an enormous mistake to me. That baby should have grown up to be a character that the cast could have interacted with to gain...oh I don't know, some piece of important knowledge, or an item, that could then later change the fate of the cast. This way, the player's choices in the 1960s segment actually have an impact on later gameplay, rather than meaning absolutely nothing.
I'd also love to know why the hell elder Sam was sent alone to prevent this situation from occurring, when the Imperatti (I think they were called? The parents of the Pariahs, or something, right?) would have surely realised the gravity of this situation? Like, how does this make any sense? And this is far from the only moment that makes no sense at all.
Why do Jaime and Robert have almost no relevance whatsoever after the 1980s segment concludes? Robert is guaranteed survival of this segment, as that part of the game is written so that two characters always survive-- be that Linda and Robert, or Sam and Robert. As annoying as Stan was, I didn't hate him because he had great dialogue that pushed other characters to have different dialogue than what we were used to. But it felt scummy that Robert was just given this sad, offscreen death instead of being included in a lot more meaningful way.
Not going to lie, it reminded me of how in Stranger Things 4, Patrick was the one teenager whose trauma wasn't really explored or given the same respect as the others. It's like the writers went, "Guys, guys! It's okay! We still have the other Black guy! This makes our game Diverse, and therefore no one could possibly complain!" Meanwhile, we get an entire cutscene about Madi's nightmares, and elder Linda's movie career and associated trauma is talked about numerous times. But all we know about 2024 Robert is that Stan took advantage of him, and then he later died, utterly miserable. Also, Sam somehow knows about this and he and Stan know one another, despite this Sam being from a different timeline than elder Linda, Madi, and Stan himself.
And Jaime, poor sweet Jaime, he really just feels like he's there as someone they can conveniently kill to shock the player. The first chance he has to die results in a horrible, very graphic death (although not the most graphic in the game by a long shot) that I feel many players will encounter because they see it as reasonable to visit the curiosities shop first, and then to later attempt to save Chris (even though her fate is the same here, regardless of what you do). And even if you should keep Jaime alive through that first confrontation with the spectral Frank Stone, it's not as though his survival impacts following events. He can die again, when fleeing Frank with Bonnie and an injured Linda. Why they have Linda, who has a gaping hole in her shoulder, attempt to pull Jaime up the platform alone while HIS OLDER SISTER just WATCHES is beyond me. But writing his death, whether it be here, or earlier, to have no impact on Bonnie's fate, or any future events, is plain bad writing.
You cannot save Bonnie, no matter what you do. And this scene makes no sense. When Frank grabs Bonnie, Linda points the camera at him, which should work. There really isn't any reasonable explanation as to why this should not work, or should not even momentarily distract him (Which could have led to a different ending where Bonnie lives and Linda dies instead?), because in the storm drain, so much as yelling at Frank causes him to abandon whoever he's attacking to seek out the new target. I suppose, at the very least, 1980s Bonnie's death does serve some kind of purpose in the 2024 storyline, because it serves as foreshadowing for Madi's potential fate. But just like Robert, 2024 Bonnie is given a sad offscreen death and we never really learn about how she or Jaime survived that night at the mill.
And I will say, it just feels shitty from a player point of view, to make it so you cannot save certain characters. Like, I'm sorry, is that a canon event? Where is Mr. O'Hara? Because Madi must be a god-damned anomaly, being Bonnie's daughter!! And Chris- god- Chris who mysteriously travels through time...I really do hate this part of the story because understanding its purpose can only happen if you manage to get the secret ending where she goes through the projector screen and DOESN'T burn and die. Which would require you to not have taken the pocket mirror or given the "protective" amulet to her. This unlocks a secret ending where she goes back in time to the moment where she, Jaime, and Linda were inintially shooting in the mill, right before Sam interrupted them. I took this as the writers trying to show us that there would be one timeline in which Frank Stone is never released (not sure how he ever was in the first place, really), likely saving them from the Entity. But other than the player somehow luckily getting this ending, I really don't see the point of Chris' time travel, because she can also be sent immediately back in the horologium, which does nothing meaningful. And why does it have to be Chris? Why not write it so it could be her or Jaime, so that maybe the player's choice to have her and Jaime breakup or not actually has some kind of impact on the gameplay?
One of the worst things about the game though, and I cannot stress this enough, is how badly the references to DBD are integrated. I love a good reference-- it can serve to add a little playful flair to a moment, or even go so far as to have the viewer look at the piece from a different perspective they had not previously considered. Buuuut... this is only if the reference is done well. And, well, what this game does could hardly be described as tolerable, even. In was so heavy-handed, it felt almost as bad as product placement in a Michael Bay movie. Many of these "references" felt out of place to the degree that someone with no knowledge of DBD would be likely able to pick them out, because they heavily disrupt either the game's aesthetic or the gameplay itself! One generator was funny, and honestly expected, but THREE of those damn things? Clunky, corny, and honestly? Lazy.
Unfortunately, I feel those three adjectives describe how I feel about the game overall. I feel bad for the people who put hard work into making it, because there is potential there for something great. But it really felt as though they were pushed to release this game as quickly as possible, so BHVR could sell us a 50 dollar, five-to-six-hour advertisement for their next DLC chapter. Hard to think anything else, really, when completion of the game is followed by a a literal ad for it.
All I can say is-- I really hope we get 2024 Linda as a survivor. It seems more likely that it will be Madi, but it is possible we could have a two-survivor chapter (unless they specifically outlined in the roadmap that there are no upcoming 2-survivor chapters?).
Madi and 2024 Linda would be cool though. We have no older women as survivors, despite having more than one older man. I think it's about damn time. And I love the mother/daughter bond that can sort of develop between Madi and 2024 Linda in the game.
#dbd#the casting of frank stone#the casting of frank stone spoilers#dbd spoilers#thoughts about media#I said essay and essay is at least 8 pages. 12 point font. double spaced by my standards.#so this is A LOT...yes. but it's not an essay. not to me. it's also not super linear and it's written in a very casual tone.#I wrote it here and there when I had a minute to spare.#anyway if you have thoughts about the game or have an answer to a question of mine- feel free to add it!#just....no funny business. I am too tired to deal with such childish behaviour. I will block trolls and the generally rude.#also- if you liked the game- no disrespect to you. if you felt it was worth your money and it entertained you- good. I'm glad.#I am content to have watched Mr. Otz play. I now know it's a game that I wouldn't ever want to play myself.#So I removed it from my wishlist after finishing his VOD. Bless that man for all he does for DBD players.
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the clock has struck 12 and it is sadly no longer halloween....... but it iS NOVEMBER FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEST
youtube
#tf2#team fortress 2#tf2 medic#medic tf2#november first#november fest#NOVEMBER FEEEEEEEST WOOOOOO#i'm very tired right now eueughh#watching these videos is like a tradition for me i've seen the whole series so many times#i love medic screaming to touhou music in my ears at 12 am#Youtube
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i'm so unironically baffled at the amount of downgrades this site pushes out on a nearly weekly basis at this point. Near half if not all of them are almost completely useless and give absolutely zero benefit to user experience, if anything @staff is quite literally distancing their userbase.... do you think i want another twitter? Like what purpose or benefit does taking away dash avatars has... what's the benefit of taking away basic accessibility features.. fucking genuinely. I hate it here. I don't know how many more feedback letters I have to send in order for all this shit to stop... i'm so tired.
#i'm so tired. like genuinely.#i'm so very tired how as an artist who also relies partially on a FUNCTIONAL social media is being forced into a fucking corner like this#where the site is broken in every sense imaginable. and you have no intention to fix it. other than making it worse.#I've seen 12 year olds with java codes do a better job than this site#and u think i'm rambling nonsense bc i'm angry and yeah. i kinda am but then again i'm fuckign exhausted. and every day I have less desire#to spend even more than a second on this site#sorry!#anyways tldr. i hate it here.#please for the love of god stop giving this site money. in anyway.#i get u want the funny checkmarks but this staff doesnt deserve your pennies in any shape.
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Okay okay okay I have a mad little headcanon about Granny Weatherwax bear with me through these self-indulgent doodle explanations okay?
So it is a known fact that on any given day she wears enough pins in her hair to build a house.
This causes trouble in things like metal detectors (or fairy circles).
The underlying cause is (the length of) her beautiful unicorn-snaring mane. (See: Lords and Ladies)
So so so so. I headcanon that in the heat of their mid-makeover prank warfare in Maskerade, Nanny orchestrates events so it all gets snipped off. (Jealous, perhaps, of Ridcully?)
But obviously Granny would rock the look.
I am such a sucker for the style-changing haircut. (Plus, no more pins needed now! Except for stabbing purposes.)
#discworld#discworld fanart#gnu terry pratchett#ye gods forgive me this is so self-indulgent#so much drivel#but it's 12:30 am and I'm a bit tired#granny weatherwax#nanny ogg#obviously Roman Holiday was my formative experience with the haircut trope
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I literally feel like I'm dying and I need to see a doctor, but I can't worry about that right now because
My bank account is literally in the negatives because I'm too disabled to work and can't make money but I can't worry about that right now because
I'm months overdue on getting my car new tags, but it won't even start if I could drive it so I need to jump the battery and get gas which I don't have money for, but I can't worry about that right now because
People are still expecting me to be social across numerous friend groups and it's pulling me in so many directions that I'm stretched so thin I'm running on no social battery for the last month, but I can't worry about that right now because
I still need to actually clean the house, do the dishes, clean the cat litter boxes, vacuum, and do my laundry... but I can't worry about that right now because
I still need to actually set up my new desk so I can stream since I haven't been able to do that for weeks and streaming is unfortunately my only source of income for how little I make every month, but I can't worry about that right now because
My partner is going through a really hard time right now and I need to be there for her and do what I can to make sure she's okay.
#People like me don't make it man. We just don't.#I'm hyper dependent on others to the point where I'd be homeless without my partner#I'm stressed day in and day out I get messages from people who want me to play games or hang out or just chat and I can't even#find the time to respond because I have 12 other things I need to be doing and those 12 other things aren't getting done because#every single thing I need to do is preventing me from doing something else and at the end of it all my health is getting worse and worse#and as it gets worse it costs more to fix and I can't get on disability without paying for a lawyer with money I literally do not have#and I'm losing it I'm literally going insane I'm pissed off because I see people blame the country I live in or the circumstances I'm in#and they act like they can't do anything and it'd be wrong of me to ask them for help#and I know when I die (and at this point it won't be long) they're going to act like this is the fault of america or some shit#they're not going to think about how they could have helped#and it sucks because some of my friends DO try to help they really do and I love them for it but it's so hard for me to see people#who don't make much money and who are also in tough situations throwing what they can at me to help me when I know people who have so much#they spend it frivolously on luxuries and I want to strangle them but then I'm not owed anything so it's not my place to tell them how#to spend their money or live their life.#and I'm tired man I'm so fucking tired I can't even stay awake for a few hours before I am too exhausted to sit upright anymore#I pass out and find myself without energy before I've even done anything and I'm only 29.
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Not to continue my recent trend of oversharing on tumblr dot com, but I am very much struggling not to feel like I'm doing everything in my entire life wrong at present
#normal things to think after your doctor tells you you need to get a blood test re-taken bc you mistimed your dose#I'm just. I'm tired man.#I've been putting off a phone call for two months#i spend every day lately torn between do I need to go to hospital or am I just unfit and anxious#I rot and decay when left alone but also people are Too Much#I want to Create but I can't get started and when I do I'm just so disappointed with whatever I make#I'm exhausted but I'm awake at 4am bc if i go to sleep tomorrow will start and I'll have to do this all again#and I need so fucking badly for someone to just crush me so hard in a really long hug until my bones realign#and i need to find past me shake her by the shoulders and yell “you're fine! you'll be fine! cut your hair! eat your greens!#take up swimming and also some new pronouns! no one else will respect em but they're for YOU and so is the health stuff#please for the love of fucking god just look after yourself better than i did!“#there's toooooo many fuckin holes in this sinking ship#I need a full body MOT and then to be cradled against the chest of a large gentle man for 12-36 hours#mr. bees speaks
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(this is Trekmupfs main) I can't believe you read my thing and liked it, I'm SUCH a fan of your blog and your thoughts on TOS; When I went through tumblr to find funny memes for my friends and saw your stuff I realized that there are some people here interested in analysis and more than memes, and it's the whole reason I started putting my notes from our groupwatch in order and online (otherwise all this would just... gather dust on our discord). You really inspired this whole thing! So if you ever wanna share thoughts under one of my posts again pleeeaaase do, I'm absolutely fanboying over here :D
This is so very flattering, and I'm extremely touched! Always glad to inspire more people to analyze media, considering that's not only what I love doing, but it's also my job :) In fact, I'm sorry it took a few days to respond, but I just got out of seeing and reviewing 56 Fringe plays in 11 days, and my brain was fried (okay, I've written about 41 so far and still have 15 to go, but hopefully I'll finish today. It's been...a long two weeks, plus I had to deal with jury duty. Not Fringe jury, real jury). I'll continue to look out for your group's reviews!
#star trek#star trek tos#mimupf#my life#asks#i should be writing but I just spent 12 days straight in the theatre for 12+ hours a day#writing madly in between and after#and I am just so damn tired#well 11 days with a one day break to celebrate my friends' kid's first birthday because i'm only human#spouse's birthday was yesterday and i saw four plays on his birthday#but i took him dancing the night before and i bought him a ridiculous cinnamon roll on my way home from play 4#theatre critic life
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